No One Cares

“You probably would not worry about what people think

of you if you could know how seldom they do!”

 ~ Olin Miller

You have heard it before.  The idea that you should not care about what others think.  That you should just be yourself and do things your way.

While this sounds great – and it is – it is actually really difficult to put into practice.  Whether it is the way you look, what you say, or how you act, no –one wants to feel embarrassed or uncomfortable.  However, is your fear of embarrassment really worth all the attention you give it?

When I had my “awakening”, I realised that I had spent my whole life doing everything for other people. The clothes I wore, the area I lived in… even my job.  Everything about my life was done to keep up a certain “acceptable” appearance.  In fact, my whole sense of importance and self-worth was dependent on making sure others approved of my choices.

It’s crazy to think about now, but I experienced severe anxiety about the possibility of losing the approval of others.  Or, doing something that might bring some undue attention to myself.  This mind-set even extended to people I didn’t know or have a relationship with.  Heaven forbid I did something that someone else might think is weird or bizarre.  I just could not stand the thought that someone might think less of me.  Can you relate?

But here’s the problem when you live your life just trying to please others and being afraid of what they might think of you.  The very things that make you special and unique become dormant.  All of your amazing characteristics and your true personality traits get hidden from those around you.  Plus it stifles your creativity and imagination and prevents you from achieving your potential.  This is true in every area of your life.  Your work, your relationships, your health and wellness … everything!

Just imagine if some of the world’s greatest innovators, artists, or leaders, constantly worried about what others thought.  We may not have some of the greatest technology, music, literature, art or so many other things that make our lives so much better.  It is the same with you.  If you are constantly worried about what others think, you may never accomplish your greatest work.

“While you might think others are concerned with how you look or what you do, they are really only concerned about themselves.”

Just as quickly as I came to the realization that my life choices were made to gain the acceptance of others, I likewise realized that nobody really cared about me and my hang-ups.  And that is the big secret that no one ever tells you!  Nobody actually cares what you look like.  What you wear, where you live, what kind of car you drive, if you have a six-pack or the size of your butt.  No one cares!

Why?

Because they are so completely absorbed with themselves and their own issues that they simply do not have the time to worry about you and your issues!  And that brings us to the next TRUTH!

Truth #2

NO ONE CARES WHAT YOU LOOK LIKE

Let’s suppose you saw someone you don’t know doing something weird, or looking different to what you think is acceptable.  How much consideration did you really give this person before you brought your attention back to yourself?  Probably not very much.  And if you not giving much attention to those around you, then it stands to reason that they are not thinking about you either.  You only think they are.

To prove this to yourself, the next time you go out, pay attention to the people around you and the way they act.  You will notice that they are not worried about you or anyone else.  They are only worried about themselves.  How they look.  How they act.  How their latest selfie turned out and how many likes it received.  While you might think others are concerned with how you look or what you do, they are really only concerned about themselves and how they think others are judging them.

Sadly, prior to coming to this realization, I had been killing myself trying to impress others.  Worrying about what they might think of me.  I was literally losing sleep thinking about people looking at my butt and thinking it wasn’t perfect.  Not only was this just completely exhausting, but it was also an absolute waste of time and energy.

However, when I really embraced the idea that no one cares what I look like, it completely changed my life.  First, the need to gain the approval of others completely left me.  I cannot even begin to tell you how incredibly liberating this were.  It immediately allowed me to experience an inner peace that I had not felt for years.  This allowed so much of the chaos and turmoil inside of my head to disappear.  My stress and anxiety levels went down too. All because I stopped worrying about what I thought others were thinking about me.

Second, when you are not obsessing over how to live your life to impress others, it frees up so much space in your mind.  With this “space”, I was able to unleash a level of creativity that I had never experienced.  Things were coming to my mind all the time and it was exciting.  It was like my life was now a blank canvas, ready for me to create my own masterpiece.  All because I stopped worrying about what others might think, took the time to figure out what was going to be best for me, and started listening to my own intuition.

Just imagine what your life would be like if instead of going about your day trying to always please others, you had the freedom to be yourself and do the things that give you the most happiness.  I can assure you, it can have truly dramatic results.

“When you free yourself to move in a way that’s right for your body, the floodgates open and your authentic, creative self will emerge.”

When you stop worrying about what others think, you will see how doing things your own way can free you both mentally and physically.  This will allow you to experience so much happiness in your life.  And not just for you, but also the people around you as well.

What if Someone Does Care About What You Look Like?  (Or at least you think they do.)

It’s so easy to say, “No one cares what I look like,” but it takes time and practice to really embrace this truth.  With that said, don’t get me wrong.  There will always be judgemental people in the world that put others down in an attempt to make themselves feel better.

Even the most judgemental people really do not care what you look like or what you are doing.  They are only concerned about themselves and their own problems and worries.  But let us suppose this was not the case and someone really was concerned with how you look – is that really something you need to worry about?

ABSOLUTELY NOT!

You have zero control over how others think and act.  If their life is so meaningless to warrant them passing judgement on you, which is something you just do not have to worry about.  Other people’s opinions of you are irrelevant.  All that matters is what you think about yourself.

If you think about it, they are the ones who are stewing in judgemental thoughts.  How awful must it be to carry that?